Even though life was heavy at the time, the holidays gave me a reason to breathe again. I remember feeling so determined to make it magical for Mateo because he deserved happiness no matter what was going on. Thanksgiving and Christmas were all so full of love. We are blessed with such a beautiful family and village. I am so grateful for the family Mateo has. Living with my sister and Mikey, we decorated the whole house a Christmassy asf. We were all going through our own things the spirt is what we needed.
It wasn’t perfect. Chris and I were both carrying so much stress, still adjusting to our new reality, and there were a lot of hard moments between us. But when it came to Mateo, I tried my best to pour everything I had into making his first holiday season special. And somehow, even in the chaos, it was.
Then came his first birthday. 🥹 With the help of family, we were able to give him the birthday party I had always dreamed of for him. Balloons, cake, all our family came. Again, I don’t know how we are so blessed. Thank you God. It felt like such a milestone, not just for him, but for us. A whole year of being parents. A whole year of surviving and learning and stumbling and getting back up again. A whole year of Mateo, the sweetest soul I never knew I needed. My happy little boy.
The day after his birthday party, we moved back into our own apartment. Chris had work lined up for that Monday, and for the first time in a long time, I felt like we were finding our way back to “normal.” It was a mix of relief and exhaustion, but I remember thinking, maybe things are finally taking a turn.
🤍🤍 How did you feel when your baby turned one? Was it more of a celebration, or did it also feel heavy in its own way?
